Daisy I wanted to take the time to write down all the things that have happened in the 2nd year of your life. I wanted to tell you about just how much you grew, about what you learned, about the wonderful experiences we had with you and that you had with others. It’s been a good year little one. I know this won’t capture all the magic, the love, joy (and frustration at times) that you bring us, but I will, as I have done all year, and as I will do always, I will try.
We have had some GOOD fun this year. We have been on so many great trips away – to the farm, to Pearl Beach, to the Blue Mountains, to Rlystone, to Lord Howe Island to Diamond Beach and of course to Paris. Your Dad and I love to get away – to go on a road trip, to go away with friends and family and enjoy new things and we hope one day you will love this too. I know that you love these trips – the time you have with your Dad and I every day and the fact that we are away from home, relaxed and happy all rubs off on you. I know that the memories I have of us in Paris together – of meeting you under the Eiffel Tower with Grandma and Lucy and Chrissy will be in my heart forever. We are lucky to do these things – not everyone gets the chance – but your Dad and I work hard to make them happen because they are important to us. We may not live in the fanciest of houses, or drive big cars, or dress you in fancy clothes, but I promise you this Daisy: that we will always explore the world and have a good time away.
We also went to some concerts for the first time, and had so many fun times with all your cousins. We finally got to meet Maddie who came back from London and I know that you two will be good mates. You make each other laugh. You have also enjoyed spending time with Olivia, Sophia and Will Clyne – playing at the beach and at their house. You got to have some great times with your cousins from Melbourne – Alice, Liam and Lucas and although you don’t really know that they are away now, I know that you remember them; we talk about them all the time. We had some great time away with the Macdonald girls in Lord Howe and at their house playing in the pool, or with their toys, dancing and dressing up. You just plain adore Zac. He is so kind with you – he takes the time to show you how to draw things, lifts you up and is very attentive to you. You look up to Mia (in fear perhaps?) and follow all her instructions that she gives you. And I know you were happy to see Ava arrive in the world for it meant that you were no longer the baby of the family. Your Grandma Susie looked after you for one day a week towards the end of the year. It was so nice for me to know you were happy there – you waved goodbye to me happily and started your love affair with dippy dippy’s (eggs) there. I know that she (and you) loved this time and I am eternally grateful for the time she took to teach you things and just love you. I like to know that is happening when I am apart from you. Your love affair with Sue began this year. Daisy, honestly, you LOVE this woman (and why wouldn’t you?) She gives you just about all the attention a little lass could want, and I know that your connection comes from someplace else – maybe you were friends or family in a past life who knows? You have had lots of sleepovers at Grandma Katie’s place and I know that the two of you have a good time together. Daisy you are blessed with an abundance of healthy, happy family members and friends. I know this won’t last, it can’t last forever, but right now you are loved by so many good people. We all are. How lucky can you get?
This year you have grown so much. Physically yes, you are taller, heavier but you are smarter. You talk. All the time. In sentences now. Just last week I gave you an ice block and you said to me “Bit cold Mummy, wrap it up” (in a tea towel). And when you didn’t want dinner you just said “No lasagne. Daisy all finished. Treat now?”. I know that you will learn more and more over the next year but I honestly fall over when I hear you do it. When I see your little brain working things out. You know all the colours, and can count as well. You love Dora and Playschool and Thomas and sharks. You request on a daily basis a screening of Ice Age (thanks Kate). Your manners are getting better every day. I am always on your back about this – but it’s only because you will get a whole lot further in this world with some manners. The way you say “please Mumma” is so sweet it breaks my heart and I will give you anything you have asked for when this is included. You still cry each and every time we drop you ate daycare and it honestly breaks your Dad and my heart each and every time. We know you are ok though, because your carers tell us that after 5 mins you are fine. I hope that you will soon grow out of this…it’s more than we can take young lady! You are funny. And bossy, so very bossy. You will just tell people to stop when you don’t have enough attention and your favourite phrase is “one more K?” The K? at the end is hilarious – both bossy and trying to convince us at the same time.
You have kept me on my toes Daisy! You teach me more and more every day. About myself, about patience and about love. I have struggled through the year at times. I have lost my mojo, I have lost my job, I have felt like a bad mother, a failure because you haven’t slept, or eaten, or done whatever (!) and I am lucky that you and your Dad just keep on loving me all the same. We have had some sadness – your friend Lachlan died at 15 months old – for no reason at all, just that it happened. It made me so sad. I kept thinking it could have been you – it bears not even thinking about. But this happens. These things happen and you just have to try and make sense of it (or not) and move on. Life is a wonderful thing, so joyful at times, and at others so sad that you just can’t imagine things could ever be better again. But they do eventually.
I want you to know how much your Dad and I love you and love each other right now. Your Dad works so hard for us all. Although he sometimes misses seeing you before you go to bed I know that putting you to bed is exactly where he would want to be. He is doing so well with his work, his own business that he started up and hopefully one day you might understand just how clever he is. And funny. He makes us both laugh. A lot. Daisy as far as men go in this world, he is a good one. I hope one day you know love like I know and am lucky enough to live every day. Passion for someone. Respect. Equality. Friendship. Kindness. Patience. Just know that your parents love each other and you so much.
I think of all the things I feel about you, about this year it is pride. I am so PROUD of you. You are a good girl almost all of the time. You always apologise when you do something naughty and at times when you lash out at me, or your father I know that it is only because you can’t express yourself in any other way and it is pure frustration. I get it. Don’t worry. I am proud the way you try to suck it up and be tough when we drop you off somewhere (again) to some other grandma or grandparent. I actually burst into tears with pride when we were away in Paris and you watched kids on the Christmas ride for day after day and then on the last day just turned to us and said “Daisy’s turn” and you just went and hopped on all by yourself, knowing no one, not understanding their language, not having Mum or Dad there to hold your hand. You just did it. And loved it. I know there will be LOTS more moments like these in the next year. Lots more letting go (from me of you). I can’t imagine the changes we have ahead of us, or the new things you will be able to do, to learn, but I know that with each new step my pride will just grow stronger. My love deeper. I am SO proud to be your Mumma. You have taught me so many things you will never know. I love you with all I have. I know at some stage I will let you down, frustrate you, annoy you, but please know that I will always just love you.
Happy Birthday Boo Boo. Puss. Daise. Beautiful Baby Girl. My funny Valentine…Daisy May Macdonald.