On the flip side there has been many a time that a comment fills me with dread and makes me feel physically sick. How many times have we checked our email in the passenger seat of the car, en route to a family occasion, or when you are out and about with the kids? Of course I shouldn’t be doing that, but I do, and find it hard to not check my blog many times a day. I just do. I’ve ruined plenty of moments that shouldn’t have been from getting a comment alert email and getting a nasty comment from someone and instantly had my day ruined. Of course that’s entirely my own fault for not separating the online world with the real world but it’s impossible not to be hurt when someone spits out something purposely hurtful and nasty to you.
It’s been almost 2 months now since I started to moderate the comments on my blog. This just means that when someone makes a comment on a post that it goes to an queue, sitting there, waiting for me to check it before it is published. On my own time. Directed by ME. When it suits ME. I am all for freedom of speech and difference in opinion, I am not, however, EVER going to have someone hurl abuse at me for no constructive reason at all. It took me a long time to come around to this idea, but now that I have? Well, it’s been SO liberating.
Now? My inbox is filled with emails. From real people. That have attached a name to themselves. I can put my big girl pants on before I head over to the comment queue and prepare myself for whatever will be on there. Oh and they are still there of course. I have control over what goes on my blog. Things cannot get away from me. People don’t have to defend me. Arguments can’t happen between people on my blog without my knowing about them. My space. My rules. Simple really isn’t it? It applies in my own home so why should my blog be any different?
I’m not sure why I was so hesitant to make the change. I’m not sure why I made myself sick with worry about it for such a long time before finally taking some control. I suppose old habits die hard when it comes to blogging – I’ll take any readers I can – good or bad and after all a comment is a comment. Right? Not for me. Not any more. All their venom, vitriol, hatred and spite can sit very happily in that queue, waiting there, never seeing the light of day. And as I said, this doesn’t mean that if someone has a difference of opinion, that I will delete and scream TROLL! I won’t. But just as I wouldn’t accept an attack in person (nor would anyone really go through with that without the freedom on the anonymous comment option behind the safety of their computer at home), I’m no longer accepting it on my blog.
And it’s just about the best decision I have ever made when it comes to BabyMac and my blogging.
Today I’m linking up with Nikki for her Blogging tips on a Saturday. When it comes to blogging, no one gets more professional, knowledgeable or willing to share than Nikki. She is the boss, and each week on a Saturday she specialises on blogging tips. Today I thought I’d share a little something I’ve worked out. Head on over and check them out!