The recap episode

It occurred to me in the shower the other day {why does everything occur to me in the shower?) that I spend many a day on here writing out quandaries and posing questions to you all and then never really giving an update on where we are with things. On the off chance that some of you may be interested I thought I might revisit some things over the past few months. It’s not quite as boring as when your favourite sitcom does the old rewind ep, it should have a little more content. Maybe.

: Controlled Crying
You never know when a post is going to strike a chord with the peeps that this one most certainly did. One of the highest google searches to my blog is “controlled crying”. All the words of support & encouragement I received truly made the whole ordeal a little easier to take. Still now, months on, I get emails from people sent in the middle of the night saying “we’re are doing it. I can her him/her screaming and my heart is breaking. TELL me it gets easier.” These emails break my heart because I know just how much it sucks. So? Where are we with it? Well after a few nights (probably 4 or 5) Harper managed to go to sleep by herself. The key for her (which also broke my heart plain in two) was when she asked “Door opey?” She wanted the door open. That’s all. So, every night when she goes to bed the last thing she says is “Door opey?” and so we leave the door open. Sure she has been sick and we have gone back to square one but the teaching doesn’t ever take long to get her back into line. There has been no resentment sitting on the cold floor. No anger. It’s just a gazillion times better. And you know the best bit? The very best bit? I can put my own kid to bed. This has changed my life. Seriously. I am not scared of bedtime. I don’t get worked up if Rob isn’t here. She can’t smell my fear. She does what I ask of her. HALLELUJAH! Sure, there are wakings in the night and you will find my perched like a dumb ass every night at the end of the 4 year olds bed, but it’s a start. If ANY of you are thinking of changing some bad sleeping patterns in someone relatively young. Do it. It’s hard, it sucks, but the end result is a happier, rested child that is working stuff out for themselves and a Mum that is happier, a husband that is happier and a more relaxed atmosphere in the house. No brainer right?

: Town business
I went to my first meeting a few weeks back where we were all given our new roles for the year ahead. Mine? COMMUNITY ENGAGEMENT. Snap! I am going to nail that right? I am engaging! I live in the community! I can get the community engaged! They are not going to know what has hit them next meeting when I have a blog, Facebook page and twitter handle set up for the School of the Arts. What’s a blog?

Speaking of town, it is looking so pretty at the moment. Daffodils and jonquils everywhere. The tips of tulip bulbs all starting to pop through the soil and blossom opened or just about to open on every tree. Even the blossom is classy down here and mostly white, not that bright flashy pink that you see in Sydney. The lawn is starting to grow a little faster and I am frantically trying to get things in order before the growth takes off in a few weeks time. It’s spring in A FEW WEEKS TIME! Although we will be having fires for a good month ahead I have to say I am really looking forward to not chopping wood and cleaning up ash everywhere for a few months. Not long to go…

: Not having sex
The funny thing with this post is that I accidentally hit publish instead of save when this went out the other night. You know that moment of “oh shit” when that happens? I had that. Big time. Especially when it’s something a little out there. Anyway, I needn’t have worried, minutes later the comments started pouring in. Wow. Such great advice. Who knew you put a DVD on and then go and have sex? That’s when I check twitter. I need to change my habits I think. So many secret emails from peeps not wanting to comment – but the universal theme? THANK GOD WE ARE NOT ALONE. I had an interesting chat with Rob about it all last night and he has a post that he would like to reply. For the men. It’s quite controversial and I’m looking forward to showing another side to the story when he gets around to writing it. I went to the Doc also yesterday afternoon and changed pills (I was on Levlen and changed to Yaz). I’m going to give that a few months and see if things get better.

And? I TOTALLY HAD SEX LAST NIGHT. TWICE. Mum, you’re welcome *tips hat*.

Seriously, like Maxabella and Tessa said. don’t over think it. Just. Get. Naked. It feels good to reconnect and the more you over think it, the more it turns into a bigger deal than it is and the more you feel guilty about it and feel like you are not doing something. Oh female complexities – sometimes we need to think like a man. Can you tell I am in my smug “oh I just had sex thing I do it all the time it’s no big deal” phase that comes after you just had sex. Let’s see where we are in a few months time shall we? Weekend request from me? SHAG YOUR MAN/WOMAN. The chirpy, helpful partner that you get at the end of it will give you a better weekend. I’m sure of it.

Speaking of weekends – have a great one! I am off to Sydney for a quick trip to see some of my favourite bloggers. I am SO excited. I love the chance to spend with these fabulous women and I just know that Saturday night will be a cracker. That and the fact I am having a night away from my kids. Bring that shit on. See you on the other side!

Comments

  1. I am DYING to hear rob’s (the male) side of all of this.

    This is our thing: I feel pretty post-baby unattractive, Dave is unattracted to said lack of confidence, vicious cycle begins.

    P.S love your town! The white picket fences, the blossoms, EVERYTHING!

  2. Anonymous says:

    Hi hun,

    I think i have worte this to you before but… i had 4 yr old that did not sleep, with all the symptoms yours has and…. there was a proplem causing it all, thank god! He had enlarged tonsils, he is having them removed soon along with his adnoids and he should start sleeping in no time, apparently its a form of sleep apnea and we see it as bad habbits formed and so on! I cant wait for no more waking, night terrors, snoring, sweating, growth pains and difficult bedtime dramas…

  3. You totally inspired me and I HAD SEX last night too. I don’t even have kids as an excuse. I’m just not usually that excited by the prospect.
    Thanks for being the blogger that talks about the stuff no one else does.
    *s*

  4. I so didn’t need to hear that you managed it twice – FFS, who does that at our age?

    x

  5. Twice? In one night? Horny teens do that BabyMac. That’s crazy talk!

    A word of advice for any men wanting some action. Seriously, wash the dishes, iron your own business shirts and say things like ‘honey, want me to bath both kids, read both of them stories, and put them both to bed? I’ll even wash their hair’. Now THAT would do it.

  6. Snap, I had sex twice on Tuesday night too. My homme has been away for 16 days walking the Kokoda Track so absence made the heart fonder and all that.
    But it was fun.
    Can’t wait to hear Rob’s side of the story.

  7. Twice!!.. Now that’s just silly!…have a fab time in town….where you out too? May see u around…ba ha ha…only if you visit my shack on the beaches n join me for a cuppa!!

  8. TWICE! Jesus woman, I do not think I have done that since I was 19!

  9. twice.

    i don’t want to talk about it.

  10. Twice?? Thats redickulous!! I might have to put an end to the drought around here this weekend!!

  11. You go girlfriend! Get your red lips on and see you tomorrow night x

  12. Ooh Rob’s side will be an interesting one to read certainly.

    Controlled crying is so heartbreaking but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. The best thing I did when Miss 5 was 6 months old was Tizzie’s Save our Sleep book – SAVED MY LIFE! And I have two perfect sleepers (brag…brag – shoot me now yes).

    Oh and have a fab weekend xx

  13. Hi Beth, just so you know i’m still lurking in your blog..can I just say THAT home is as you would say Holy Cheeses gorgeous….I’m sure by now you know its the best thing you ever did..I have to hold myself back from not peeking ahead of where i’m upto..but shit, wish I could skip a few lines ( but no i cannot)After seeing for the first time your first wash hanging above the beautiful green grass I had to stop for a Hello!!!! Love it…I loved to see my baby washload of white nappys and tiny singlets blowing in the sun…..I would love it more in that glorious yard looking through them wow! windows..as you can see i’m very Jelly of you…cheers.

  14. Hope you know how fabulous you are lovely! Brilliant recap episode so to speak….all those posts were amazing and ones I totally relate to. You’re my hero and though I will never blog about our sex lives on my own blog I’d be happy to comment away on your posts any time at all! :) Trust you had a fabulous time….which I know you will have. LOVE your work. xxx

  15. Anonymous says:

    Your blog is quickly becomming a favourite..LOVE your work and guaranteed a laugh! Jacinta B

  16. Dude, this is what happens when I go away. I missed so much. Note to self. DO not go away :P

  17. Oh, what have I missed? Now I’m off to find the original post that spurred this post on.

    Twice. Now who’s a lucky girl then? I hope this has started something good. (Or somethings!)

    xx

  18. Levlen made me a moody banshee. I’ve been on Yaz for +12 months now and I feel normal.

    Also interested in hearing Rob’s side of the story :)

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